What Causes Indecisiveness (and How to Overcome it)
What causes Indecisiveness (and How to Overcome it)
Written by: Lauran Hahn, LMHC
Every time you’re about to make a decision, you feel stuck. You’re afraid that no matter what you choose, it will be the wrong decision. Your difficulty deciding prevents you from moving forward in your life. You feel like you’re spinning your wheels because the doubt is clouding your judgment, whether you’re deciding on small things like what to say in a conversation or making big life decisions like changing careers or ending a relationship. You wonder why you can’t just make decisions easier. You know it shouldn’t be that hard, but your mind won’t let it be.
I am an anxiety therapist in Orlando. In this article, I will walk you through why we get stuck in our decisions, both small and significant ones, how anxiety fuels indecisiveness, and practical ways to break free from the constant cycle of overthinking in the moment and in the long term.
Is Indecisiveness a Form of Anxiety?
Yes, indecisiveness can be a form of anxiety. Indecisiveness is a fear of making the wrong decisions, even the small ones. Internally, one part of you may be thinking of doing one thing, and another part wants to do something else. This tug-of-war makes you question every option, replay every possible outcome, and worry about future regret. When this happens often, you start feeling tense, frustrated, and mentally exhausted. Indecisiveness can come from small everyday decisions, big life-changing decisions, like which job to accept or which college to attend.
Can Anxiety Cause Indecisiveness?
Yes, anxiety can cause indecisiveness because it keeps the brain stuck in what-if mode, ruminating over possible outcomes. When anxiety activates the amygdala, the prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for decision-making, goes offline, causing decisions to come from an emotional, fight-or-flight state rather than a rational one. Here are a few key ways anxiety keeps us trapped in indecision:
1. Overthinking Outcomes
When faced with a choice, we usually ruminate over which decision is best. You may replay scenarios in your head and try to predict the future. You then second-guess yourself and delay taking action, hoping that more time will bring clarity, when in reality, it only deepens the internal conflict and uncertainty.
2. Self-Doubt
You question your judgment and ability to handle the consequences of your choices. This affects your confidence.
3. Avoidance
Avoidance is a common response to anxiety. When you’re so used to avoiding everything that causes you to feel uncomfortable, you may delay or avoid making decisions to escape the discomfort of uncertainty.
Why Are Some People More Indecisive Than Others?
Some people are more indecisive than others because traits like perfectionism, self-doubt, and fear of judgment make decision-making feel riskier. These tendencies increase anxiety and overthinking, which can lead to second-guessing every choice and difficulty trusting one’s own judgment.
1. Perfectionism and Fear of Mistakes
People with perfectionist traits are often the ones who struggle most with indecisiveness and anxiety about making the wrong choice. Perfectionism makes people indecisive because they feel pressured to make the right choice every time, and the idea of failure or regret feels unbearable.
2. Lack of Decision-Making Practice Early in Life
Some people were never taught how to make decisions. That sort of lack of confidence and lack of autonomy when you’re younger can lead to indecisiveness as an adult. When you grow up without chances to practice making choices and handling the consequences, decision-making can feel overwhelming later in life.
3. Fear of Judgment or Disapproval
For many, indecisiveness also comes from worrying about what their family, partner, friends, and others will think. The fear of disappointing someone, being criticized, or judged by others can make it hard to make up your mind, even about the smallest decisions.
How Can I Overcome Indecisiveness?
To overcome indecisiveness, start by using grounding techniques to calm the amygdala and engage the prefrontal cortex, which improves decision-making. Then align your choices with your core values and explore your inner ambivalence with curiosity. Each part of you holds wisdom, and acknowledging both sides helps you make clearer, more confident decisions. For more detailed information, follow the steps below:
1. Calm Your Nervous System
Anxiety interferes with our ability to intuitively know which direction to take. There are many ways to reset your nervous system. Use breathing exercises, such as Box Breathing and the 4-7-8 Breathing technique. Engage in grounding exercises, such as 51 Grounding Techniques to Help You Feel Grounded Now and 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding. Check out this comprehensive guide for more grounding exercises. The goal is to help your brain and body shift out of anxiety and into a relaxed state, creating the calm needed for clear decision-making.
2. Align With Your Values
Sometimes working through indecision is as simple as identifying your core values and using them as a guide. When you align your choices with what matters most to you, decisions become clearer and more grounded. You can follow our step-by-step process for aligning with your core values. Click here to download a list of core values.
3. Understand the Wisdom Within Ambivalence
Indecisiveness often comes from competing parts within us, each with its own needs and priorities. For example, one part may want to focus on family, while another seeks self-care or rest. By slowing down and listening to what each part is trying to express, you can uncover the wisdom behind your ambivalence and find a balanced way forward.
How Can Anxiety Therapy in Orlando Help You Rewire Negative Thinking Patterns?
Therapy provides tools to identify and challenge the thought loops that keep you stuck. Through anxiety therapy in Orlando, you can learn to:
1. Reflect On the Past
Take time to look at all of the different choice points that you’ve made in your life and analyze how things have turned out for you. Look at what you’ve learned because each choice offered a different lesson, experience, and opportunity for growth.
2. Adopt a Mindset that There’s No Such Thing As a Wrong Decision
There aren’t really “wrong” decisions. There are just different pathways, each with something to learn and grow from. Every choice teaches us something new, whether it’s about ourselves, others, or the world around us. When we approach life with that mindset, there truly are no wrong decisions.
3. Explore the Underlying Causes
Sometimes indecisiveness stems from past experiences or learned patterns we’re not even aware of, which makes it hard to break free from insecurity and anxiety on our own. Anxiety therapy in Orlando offers a safe and supportive space to explore the roots of your indecisiveness, whether it’s a deeply ingrained fear of failure, unhealed trauma, or long-standing self-doubt.
Ready to Tackle Anxiety with Anxiety Therapy Orlando?
If you are ready to confront your fears so that you can fully show up to your life now, reach out to us. We are here to walk with you on your healing journey.
1. Fill out our New Client Consultation form here.
2. Once you complete the form, you'll be invited to schedule a 15-minute phone consultation with one of our anxiety therapists.
3. Get ready to start your healing journey!
Additional Anxiety Resources
Anxiety Therapist Shares How to Become a Better Decision-Maker
Decision-Making Anxiety? Anxiety Therapist Shares 5 Steps to Make Decisions Easier
How to Make Difficult Decisions
Teenage Counselor Helps Your Anxious Teen With College Applications
Ready for Anxiety Therapy Orlando?
Do you need more guidance on making difficult decisions? If you’re ready to ditch the anxiety around your decisions, schedule a free 15-minute call, so we can get you started with the best anxiety therapist right away.
Other Therapy Services Offered at Mindful Living Counseling in Orlando
We offer a variety of therapy services, including EMDR therapy, Trauma Therapy, Eating Disorder Therapy, Teen Therapy, and Toxic Relationship Therapy. Additionally, we provide Guided Meditations for our clients.
A Word From Our Founder, Lauran Hahn, LMHC, on Decision-Making Anxiety
Throughout the years, I have encountered my own challenges with anxiety surrounding decision-making. Through EMDR Therapy and many of the strategies I discuss in this blog, I have discovered how to approach choices with greater ease, and I no longer stress over decisions as I used to. I own Mindful Living Counseling in Orlando, where I focus on assisting clients with managing anxiety and trauma. I am a certified Sensorimotor Psychotherapist and EMDR Therapist, and I hold the status of an EMDRIA Approved Consultant. My aim is to enable individuals to find calmness in their bodies, tranquility in their minds, and stronger connections in their relationships.