Written by Lauran Hahn, LMHC
Founder of Mindful Living Counseling Orlando
Updated October 14, 2026
Have you ever felt numb, distant, or like you're watching your life from the outside? Maybe you struggle to recall certain memories, or emotions seem just out of reach. That sense of disconnection can feel confusing and isolating, leaving you wondering, Why do I feel this way?
At Mindful Living Counseling Orlando, we help people heal from trauma at a pace their nervous system can handle. When disconnection shows up in trauma therapy, we take it as a sign to slow down, not push through, so the parts of you that have worked so hard to protect you can finally relax and healing can last.
As a Trauma Therapist, I have worked with many clients seeking trauma therapy who don't have access to their emotions, body sensations, or even memories.
Looking through a trauma lens, one possible answer is that feeling connected with these aspects of self may be too painful and overwhelming.
When disconnection to aspects of self is present, that is my cue to slow down in trauma therapy. This, of course, can be frustrating for clients. And that makes sense. When folks reach out to a trauma therapist, they are ready to let all the disturbing material go.
It's important to note, however, that we can only go as fast as the nervous system will allow. What does that mean exactly? If there are psychological protections in place, we will need to work with the protective system and honor the internal protections that have been created.
How do we Honor The Protective System?
Using the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model, we look at the protective system through a parts lens and understand that the action of disconnecting is actually a part of the self who is trying to protect us from intense emotional pain. For a deeper dive into IFS, check out this post.
Disconnection as Protection
Disconnection isn’t a flaw or failure; it’s an adaptive response. Dissociation, in particular, serves as a shield, helping us survive situations that feel too intense to process in the moment. In IFS, we recognize this as the work of protective parts that act to keep distress at bay. Working with the protectors allows us to gain insight into our history and begin to create compassion for our protective system. We begin to broaden our perspective to include seeing the intent behind the protective strategies, which paves the way for self-understanding, self-compassion, and then self-acceptance.
The Importance of a Parts Approach
When beginning trauma therapy, many people understandably want to move quickly toward relief and resolution. However, true healing requires patience and respect for the parts of us that have been working so hard to protect us. As trauma expert Janina Fisher wisely shares, When it comes to trauma therapy, slower is faster. If we try to override these protective mechanisms too quickly, we risk activating more distress and resistance. By working with our protectors rather than against them, we allow for deeper, lasting healing.
Building Safety and Trust
Creating a sense of internal safety is essential for effective trauma work. This means honoring the role of protective parts and helping them understand that healing doesn’t require their destruction—it requires their collaboration. When we build trust with these parts of ourselves, they often begin to relax, allowing access to deeper emotions that need attention and care. A safe therapeutic environment—whether in individual work or with a therapist—creates the foundation for this transformative process.
For those of us who have experienced trauma, we've likely had the experience of someone bulldozing our boundaries, completely dismissing our fears, concerns, and wishes. If we blow past the internal protectors without understanding their role, we are likely to retraumatize the very parts of ourselves that have worked so tirelessly to keep us safe.
It's the role of a trauma therapist to guide folks through trauma processing safely and in a way that honors the self-system.
Understanding dissociation and disconnection as protective responses helps us shift from frustration to compassion. By respecting our internal protectors and approaching healing at a measured pace, we create the conditions necessary for lasting change. If you or someone you know struggles with trauma responses, know that healing is possible—and it begins with honoring the wisdom of your internal system.
Common Questions About Dissociation
What does a therapist do when a client dissociates?
When a client dissociates, a therapist slows things down. Together, we get curious about what happened in the moment, or the moments, right before the dissociation. In my experience, when a therapist gently guides the client into that curiosity, the awareness itself begins to bring the client back. Simply noticing the dissociation starts to bring them out of it.
What techniques help with dissociation in therapy?
First, we bring awareness to the dissociation and get curious about its function: what problem was it solving? Understanding why it showed up is the heart of the work. I also use the Back of the Head Scale, which asks clients to rate how present they are right now; that awareness alone naturally helps them become more present. As a somatic therapist, I use anything that engages the senses or the body in the present moment, like tossing a ball back and forth or the 5-4-3-2-1 grounding method.
What trauma causes dissociation?
I believe any trauma can cause dissociation. With a single overwhelming event, like a physical trauma that was too much to bear, the body stays present while the mind disappears in a sense. With ongoing childhood trauma, emotional or physical, a child can develop dissociation as a way to soften the impact of experiences that were too much to bear. Either way, dissociation is the mind's way of protecting us when there's no other way out.
Can I do trauma therapy or EMDR if I dissociate?
Yes. EMDR has eight phases. Phase one, history taking, may be modified depending on the complexity of the trauma history. Phase two, preparation, is safe for anyone to engage in. Phase three, where we begin working with the memory, and the reprocessing phases that follow may be postponed or modified depending on the severity of the dissociation, because we want people to stay within their window of tolerance while processing.
Trauma Therapy at Your Pace in Orlando
If you notice numbness or disconnection, or you're frustrated that trauma therapy isn't moving faster, you're not doing it wrong. Our trauma therapists in Orlando will work with your protective parts at a pace your nervous system can handle. If past experiences are still showing up in your body, your emotions, or your relationships, EMDR therapy may be part of that work.
About Trauma Therapist Lauran Hahn, LMHC
Lauran Hahn, LMHC (FL License #MH15246), is the founder of Mindful Living Counseling Orlando and a licensed therapist who understands the challenges of coping with trauma and anxiety, and helps clients who feel numb or disconnected understand dissociation as a protective trauma response. As a Certified EMDR Therapist and EMDRIA-Approved Consultant and a Certified Sensorimotor Psychotherapist, she is dedicated to guiding individuals on their healing journeys.
